Status report

I thought it was about time for another status report, since I go along assuming that everyone knows just where I am on this journey at all times.
Physically: I really am doing amazingly well, so far. The stomach palaver is intermittent and never so bad that it needs the Tylenol plus codeine that I keep on the shelf just in case. Today, for example, I'm fine, and enjoying the feeling.
I'm able to do about whatever I want -- while I'm nowhere near the workout schedule I was on while I was gearing up for the surgery, Jerry and I still make it in to the Y for 25 min. on the stationary bike and a round of the machines three times a week. No, not very fast on the bike and not very heavy on the machines, but I'm there and able to do it. And I go to Yoga every Thursday evening, which is as good for my soul as my body. Jerry and I do our usual walk every morning, though mine is limited to flat ground, because my brace doesn't bend at the ankle. We go a ways together and then he does the steep loop on his own and I just walk around the neighborhood.
Just as well I do this, because I'm pretty sedentary the rest of the time.
I still don't have the stamina I used to have, and will suddenly lose energy as though someone had pulled a thread and everything leaks out. But a short rest usually takes care of that.
So that's physically. There's been a bit of a change in my psychological state that I find interesting, because it will probably continue as time goes by. That is that I've now beaten the odds. Most people with inoperable pancreatic cancer don't make it past six months. I was diagnosed in February. On the one hand I feel so well that I don't know why I shouldn't go on feeling like this for years. On the other, I know that it is literally a matter of time. As I look ahead part of me thinks that I have exactly as much time as everyone else in the world: right now, and the indefinite future. Part of me mourns what I will never know I've missed.