Just got back from the every-six-months CAT scan. This one has made me a bit more nervous than usual, because I've developed a few things that can't quite be called symptoms. They're more like blips on the radar, one by one not meaning much, but taken together perhaps pointing in a direction I don't want to look.
There's the weight loss, except that the weight seems to have stabilized again. Varying appetite, which seems to have little to do with how hungry I am.
There's the crushing/crashing fatigue that hits every day so that I need to take a nap. But again, I'm not the only one who takes what my grandma used to call a loll-down in the afternoon.
There's the ache under my ribs on the right side that is definitely more noticeable than it was a few months ago.
There's the CA19-9 that seems stuck around 150, though Dr. Nickerson points out that it hasn't changed much, and it's a major rise that is indicative of problems.
I wasn't even going to write anything until after Monday, when we see the doctor, but I'm trying to be completely honest here, and that includes worries, even when (I hope, I hope) unfounded.
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What do you do when you find out you have pancreatic cancer? Tell everyone about it, of course. Why "green bananas?" Because we keep buying them as a sign of faith in the future. What do we need from you? Good thoughts and the occasional bad joke.
3 comments:
Oh, Lucie! You are so in my thoughts and prayers!!!! I hope I'll see you Tuesday. I definitely plan to be there. And someday I hope we can sit down to a two-hour-cup-of-not-coffee. (Unless you're up for coffee again :o) I'm thinking of you!
Joy!
Katie
You are entitled to worry about any changes you don't like, are you kidding? But go see the doc on Monday to get another spin on these developments--then let us know!
Enjoy today--it is a good one!
I hope you are having lots of spring sunshine this weekend. If not, enjoy whatever there is. Thinking of you--
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